small / tall starters

splattermemes:

requested by anon. Feel free to change pronouns or anything else !

small

• “Get down here!”
  
• “Wow…I’d want to climb that tree, if you know what I mean.” / “Do birds ever sit on you and get confused?” / “Hey, Groot.”
  
• “I’m not short. I’m fun-size.”
  
• “Good, adorable, wonderful things come in small packages.”
  
• “I don’t appreciate your height.”
• “I CAN REACH FOR IT MYSELF.”
• “I’m not short, you just have the height of a Transformer.”
  
• “I KNOW you can see me.”
  
• “Fear me!!!”
  
• “Uh…you’re blocking me.”
  
• “Can you lift me for a second?”
  
• “Slow down! I have short legs.”
  
• “I have a super power. It’s called, my head never hits the ceiling.”
  
• “Have you seen him/her/them? He’s/she’s/they’re like a mountain.”
  
• “I always win at hide and seek.”
  
• “I’ve always looked up to you…literally. Actually, can you sit down?”
  
• “Heels make me feel powerful.”
  
• “Do tall people have…big..hands..?”
  
• “I might be short, but my ego is huge.” / “I might be short, but I will drag you down to my level.”
  
• “I can’t reach your face, but I can kick your junk.”
  
• “You don’t know the struggle when all shirts/dresses/pants are too long on you.”
  

tall

• “I’m afraid of you because short people are closer to hell.”
• “”How is it ironic that I’m afraid of heights?”
  
• “Does my height offend you?”
  
• “Let me reach that for you.”
  
• “You can’t slap me if you can’t even reach my face.”
  
• “I’m not tall, you’re just the size of an Oompa Loompa.”
  
• “Huh? Who said that? I can’t see anyone.”
  
• “It’s impossible to hide from you.”
  
• “No, I don’t play basketball.”
  
• “I’m not slowing down because you’re short.”
  
• “You’re like a cute little fairy.” / “You’re like a small, terrifying gremlin.”
  
• “My legs are long and sexy.”
  
• “I’m not looking down on you. Except literally.”
  
• “Aw, you look like a kid. How cute.”
  
• “Being small makes you optimal for carrying.”
  
• “You know what comes in small packages? Grenades.”
• “All the cool presents come in big boxes. Like bouncy castles.”
  
• “Why are you standing on the counter?”
  
• “I may be tall, but my temper is short.” / “I may be tall, but my feelings are small. And fragile.”
  
• “You don’t know the struggle when all pants/skirts/dresses are too short on you.”
  
• “Let me block the sun for you.”
  
• “Hey, short stack.” / “What’s up, shorty?”